@AsgardianRose: The hardest part of being Darth Vader is never being able to sneak up on anyone because your theme music started playing.
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@KeetPotato: [reading message i found in a bottle that drifted onto the beach] to myself: "updog.. what's updog?" [another bottle hits my foot]
@tchrquotes: thanks, but I'M TOO FAR AWAY FOR YOU TO BE HOLDING THE DOOR OPEN FOR ME WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS STOP IT
@InternetHippo: Look, if you didn’t want to go to prison you should’ve started a war or destroyed the economy. But you downloaded a movie, you felon