@theshamingofjay: The human soul weighs 1.2lbs. I know because I've weighed myself before and after I walk into my job
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@TheCatWhisprer: Instead of a flask I keep a small kitten in my jacket pocket that I pull out for a quick pet whenever I need a pick-me-up.
@EliTerry: It's kill or be killed. Or eat a sandwich. Maybe go for a light jog. Draw a picture of a duck. There are a lot of options out there.