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@onelongbender: The international address of Twitter
@wendchymes: We're having lobsters for dinner .
Update - we have pet lobsters now
@yoopnative: Just ran outside in a t shirt & panties to save a bird from my cat's mouth. My kid thinks I'm a hero. My neighbor wants to have drinks later
@AphroditeAfter5: No Grandma, "sausage fest" is not a new special breakfast at IHOP
@meganamram: Just heard about this teacher who had sex with her student. Another reason I won't send MY dog to obedience school
@Asbo_Unicorn: I'm not apathetic, I prefer emotionally constipated.