@jwoodham: The iPhone 6 looks pretty cool, but it still lets people leave voicemails, so they apparently haven't worked out all the bugs yet.
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@SondraDeeMe: If you see your ex, wrap your hands behind your neck and pretend you're making out with someone. That'll show him you're still crazy AF.
@AimeeHelene1: *waters flowers* *flowers die* *sprays weeds with poison* *weeds mutate, quadruple in size, grow 3 heads, and start speaking in tongues*
@SatansTongue: Horton hears a who Horton hears a what Horton hears a chicka chicka slim shady Horton is listening to Eminem
@JohnHilsen: Crazy but true: Over 80 percent of twins seperated at birth have the same exact birthday.