@Cowtuk: The iPhone 7 is water-resistant, has stereo sound and a better camera but it doesn't have that one feature that I want: affordability.
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@DWaitress: You're right, sir. It's MY fault that your credit card was declined. Please, tell me again how much money you have in that account.
@aka_fatman: *Jesus, bursting out of a chest cavity, spraying the room with blood and viscera* "My God, Johnny? DID YOU LET CHRIST INTO YOUR HEART?!?"
@xofreckles: Lesson learned: toddlers don't understand sarcasm. As a side note, don't say 'bite me' around toddlers that don't understand sarcasm