@kirthyiyer: The location of a pimple on your body is directly correlated to how much your body hates you.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: Santa is basically a fat man who doesn't understand how robbery is supposed to work.
@Book_Krazy: [Interview] Your resume just says "I'm a mom". Why in the world would I hire you? Me: BECAUSE I SAID SO THAT'S WHY!