@XplodingUnicorn: [end of a job interview]
Interviewer: Any questions?
Me: If you could become half robot, would you do it?
Him:
Me:
Him: Which half?
@ericsshadow: I can tell exactly how much someone weighs by how much noise they make when I push them down the stairs.
@Book_Krazy: [spelling bee]
Your word is 'monosyllabic'
"Can you describe it in a sentence?"
Yes
@MoistPork: Just got invited to an "alcohol-free" wedding. The happy couple will be sad when they realize it's going to be a "present-free" wedding too.
@HatfieldAnne: Mom used to say the only accessory a fashionable girl needs is a virtuous reputation. But it's bracelets.
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