@Mickey_McCauley: The main problem with gay marriage is when two men hold the knife to cut the cake they will be too strong and cut through the plate & table.
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@pdxjohnny99: The coolest thing about the last Hobbit movie was knowing it was the last Hobbit movie.
@rachelle_mandik: BOSS: It's come to my attention that you've disabled attachments for emails. You have to fix that. BUDDHA: But attachments cause suffering.
@Storminika: Cops got new drunk driving tests. There's one they pull out a wallet-size photo of Whoopi Goldberg & ask you, 'Is she attractive?'