@MrsMikePatton: The main reason I got divorced is because I got married.
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@krisv_723: Everyone on FB is posting the status- I voted. I guess it's truthful Tuesday so I posted- I once killed a hobo & hid his body in a barrel.
@runolgarun: "Sorry, I fail to see how I 'misled' you when my profile CLEARLY says I'm 'a total cat person'?" - half-cat/half-person being after bad date
@TribalSpaceCat: Very normal stages of anger: 1) kinda upset 2) crying 3) imagining yourself singing a revengeful song to them at a talent show
@jackie_ibbyxo: If you yell Bloody Mary into a mirror 3 times at 3AM, as loud as you can, your mom will appear and tell you to shut up and go to bed.