@AmberDonn: The main reason I lost my virginity was to ensure I wouldn't be sacrificed anytime soon.
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@MsSugar_Kisses: "You should leave your wife..." The secret note I leave on my husband's windshield every morning...
@Skullcat: I've done some pretty stupid things while I've been drunk, but in alcohol's defense, I've done a lot of pretty stupid things sober, too.
@Ben_Langley_: When I'm bored, I like to hold wedding ceremonies for my kitchen utensils. "I now pronounce you pan and knife."