@omgthatspunny: The man who fell into an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
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@Barknado69: [Date] Her: *giggles* whoops you got a hair right there Me (nervous she's trying to clone me): give it back
@kateberlant: Once accidentally liked an insta of someone I hadn’t spoken to in yrs so I had to like 1/2 her entire feed & reach out abt getting lunch
@JKickinit30: You can't control what people say or do. The only thing you can control is how much accelerant to use.