@OhNoSheTwitnt: The moral of Snow White is if a woman poisons you because you're prettier than her, find some men to chase her off a cliff while you sleep.
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@TheMichaelRock: Me: Hey lady, you can't park there. Her: I'm just running into Starbucks. Me: Oh shit, my bad. Laws don't apply to you then.
@sageboggs: "What should we call this thing in the ocean that is land?" How about island? "Seems too obvious" What if we pronounced it weird "Perfect"
@mayamanion: The whole "bad boy" thing is fun until you have kids with him. Ooh you drank away the diaper money? That's soooo hot