@ieatanddrink: The more you learn about Ebola, the more terrifying it is
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@WhatevaConc: The word résumé has fireworks coming out of it to help with the pronunciation yet we're left to fend for ourselves with colonel?
@ElliotHetherton: Doctor: Any food allergies? Patient: Sometimes dairy products disagree with me Carton of milk: That's not true
@dumbbeezie: Please don’t feel you need to explain your opinions to idiots. We do not care what you think.
@my_minivan_life: "Owen, you must hide this baby from Anakin Skywalker at all costs." "Okay. Should we continue to call him Luke Skywalker?" "That's cool."