@WritingWilkie: The most embarrassing moment of my life was when I called my teacher "mom" during sex.
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@PetrickSara: Welcome back to school kids. Please form an orderly line. If you don't already have a highly contagious virus, one will be assigned to you.
@Piecezilla: Putting a bell around a cow's neck to circumvent its stealthiness is just wrong. I say let them hunt.
@squirrel74wkgn: If you accidentally drop a roll of toilet paper while sitting down, it will roll approximately 65 feet away from you. Science.
@dubstep4dads: Me: this is bullshit. conditioner and shampoo in one? impossible Walmart employee who I have in a headlock: sir I didn't make the shampoo