@Andrea__B__: The most important thing in life is to be yourself, unless you can be Batman...always go with Batman
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@AntozWolf: Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all the dogs that are excited for the car ride until we realize where we're going.
@GodfreyElfwick: Mark my words, the amount of candles I'm gonna burn tonight is going to make ISIS think long and hard before doing any more terrorism.
@generaldietz: Baby Soldier: Ma'am. Your husband is MIA. Soldiers wife: *covers crying face with hands* Baby Soldier: Oh great! Now his wife is MIA too.
@BigHeb7: I've been saying I'll sleep when I'm dead for so long, I'm starting to really look forward to dying.