@Evan_Hadfield: The most uncomfortable moment in my day is the time spent waiting in silence while someone searches for a 'funny' YouTube clip I *need* to see.
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@samknight1: What if global warming *is* a hoax and we clean up our air and oceans, create millions of jobs, and become energy independent for nothing?
@ChribHibble: FUN GAME: Ride a bicycle with an empty baby seat on the back down a busy street whilst loudly saying "You're being VERY well behaved."
@badbanana: I'll be signing books at Barnes & Noble from 6 p.m. to whenever they kick me out for ruining all their books.
@AddledPixie: "Unhand me you cad!" I shriek, before turning disappointedly to see that I've only caught my shirt in the silverware drawer.