@Evan_Hadfield: The most uncomfortable moment in my day is the time spent waiting in silence while someone searches for a 'funny' YouTube clip I *need* to see.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: How was your first day of school? 5-year-old: Long. Me: I'm sure tomorrow will be better. 5-year-old: Wait, I have to go back?
@_NinJar: I was makin out with a cute girl but it got ruined when she ran her hand up my leg and squeezed all the spaghetti out of my pocket