@KentWGraham: The movie scene where discarded clothes lead to lovers in bed, except it’s my clothes leading to my wife picking them up and cursing me.
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@Shanomenonandon: WHISKERS: There's nothing there. Go ahead. BLIND PERSON: *Steps off cliff* WHISKERS: Technically ^-- why we don't have seeing-eye cats
@GrabTheWEness: I was really into the idea of Salsa dancing, until I learned there are no chips. Or salsa.
@michelleisawolf: This weekend is daylight savings time, which means the clock on my microwave will be right again.
@generaldietz: priest: you may now kiss the pride me: excuse me? priest: *motions to the other side of the altar where 7 to 8 lions with lipstick wait*