@ForeverHairy: The nice thing about getting a pet lobster is that you can always threaten to eat it when your kid stops taking care of it.
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@aspaul: I like my sentences like I like my women: awkward but with good colon usage and regular periods.
@EliTerry: "looks like a burrito fell out his pocket, hes crawling up to get it and crying. thats gonna cost points" - commentators on my snowboard run
@shariv67: When villainy didn't pay anymore, The Riddler got a job writing furniture assembly instructions for IKEA.
@omgthatspunny: The comedian stopped at the fabric store on his way to a comedy gig. He was looking for new material.