@juliussharpe: The NSA has been tracking phone records for Verizon customers. They skipped AT&T because those people can't complete calls.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheToddWilliams: COP: Your home was robbed ME: Dang I had a self-designed alarm system C: Didn't work M: Back to the drawing board C: They stole that M: Dang
@truegritrumble: ME:John's coming over for dinner. WIFE:Work John or Been to Europe John? JOHN:*from outside* This door reminds me of one I saw in England.
@abhorrent_wife: Sometimes I have my shit together, sometimes I eat an unidentified white substance out of my hair and am grateful when it's frosting.