@JohnHilsen: The number one piece of advice I could give to fish is to stay hydrated.
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@TheToddWilliams: [boss's office] I'm tired of staff that think they know everything! Do you know what I mean, Murray? "No, sir" I like your style, Murray.
@abhorrent_wife: I don't always try to use big words but when I do, I accidentally tell a mother her toddler was a necrophiliac today instead of narcoleptic.