@JermHimselfish: The only meal my girlfriend ever makes for me is alphabet soup because even when we aren't fighting she still loves to put words in my mouth
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@weinerdog4life: Do not break eye contact with your waitress as you put the spaghetti in your wallet.
@outsmartedmommy: I never knew how long it took a human to fall asleep until I had kids. In case you're wondering it's 2 hours, 3 cups of water, & 18 books.
@ddsmidt: Familiarity with a stranger might mean they're an old soul you knew in a former life. But it's more likely a sociopath. ~Inspirational