@nachosarah: the only reason you should be showing me pictures of your kids is if they're missing or you want them to be
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@Burtslorp: WHAT DO WE WANT? Migraine relief. WHEN DO WE WANT IT? Yell again & they'll never find your body.
@Sassafrantz: Started a pillow fight with my boyfriend, but I forgot that's where I hide my Oreos.
@buhsbaby_baby: Autocorrect just changed "carnie" to "catnip" and now all my friends think I slept with a bunch of catnips last night.
@HeyANow: Truth: My 85yr old grandmother's answering machine says, "I'll call you back when I want to, if I want to." Heroes are all around us.