@krisv_723: The only thing between me & a killing spree is the fact that I'd have to poop in front of people in prison.
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@david8hughes: [at the drs] Dr: are you sexually active? Me: yeah Dr: with real people Me [avoiding eye contact & twisting my foot in the ground]: yip
@BonaFideIntent: Me: LARGE FRY! McDonald's Manager: Ma'am, you can't use the drive-thru riding a stick pony. Please leave NOW Me: I WILL CUT YOU! *sirens*
@FeverFlave: I don't like the gerbil I become when I'm stuck in a revolving door.
@Donnie_Fairburn: Insanity [in•san•i•ty] (noun): Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results See Also: Going back to your ex
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