@bjaynash: The only thing my girlfriend blows is everything out of proportion.
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@donni: ME: Can I have the job please INTERVIEWER: I meant, like, questions ABOUT the job ME: Ah, yes. About the job: Can I have it
@NoogsCorner: Cop: You been drinking?nnMe: No.nnCop: Say the alphabet backwards.nnMe: Alphabet the. nnCop: Hilarious. Say each letter.nnMe: Each letter.
@Andrea__B__: God promised men that good obedient wives would be found in all 4 corners of the world, then he made the world round. What a funny guy
@just1fool: The last beer didn't tell me why life is so confusing but it told me the next one would.