@thomas_violence: the only time I can imagine clicking on a Facebook story is maybe if I got attacked by a bird while trying to do something else
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@ErrenMichaels: Reckon the first person to make popcorn by accident probably ran away for a while.
@Matty_Softmitts: I confuse "playing dead" with "playing dumb" so if I ever encounter a bear I'll probably be like "Listen, I don't even know how I got here."
@AimeeHelene1: Don't let the correct punctuation fool you; I'm basically a 4 year old with good grammar.
@katbento: Why hasn't a phone that charges itself just by scrolling the screen ever been invented? What are our scientists doing?