@McNevich: The only way I'm listening to a voicemail is if I think the pizza guy is lost
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@ianduhig: "I am the ghost of Christmas Future Perfect Subjunctive: I will show you what would have happened were you not to have changed your ways!"
@Swishergirl24: The cable company told me they would send a guy out and I need to be home between the hours of 1pm and 2014.
@TheCiscoKidder: My wife never catches me scoping out the hot chick because she's too busy judging the hot chick.