@deviledlegs: The other day my son asked me who picks up the seeing eye dog's poop.
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@nurserycrimes: a romantic scene where we're running toward each other but then i run past you and pick up your dog
@Brianhopecomedy: 5 year old: "That's a big truck!" "It's a moving truck." "ALL TRUCKS MOVE." Why am I the one that feels like an idiot?
@behindyourback: This Slow Jaywalker Thinks The Driver Of The Oncoming Car Values Human Life More Than Proving A Point, What Happens Next Will Surprise Him!