@deviledlegs: The other day my son asked me who picks up the seeing eye dog's poop.
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@elonjames: "...and I would've won if it weren't for you meddling minorities, women, gays, young people..." - Mitt Romney #ScoobyDooVillain
@LuvPug: I yelled "STOP EATING CAT TURDS OR IT WILL HURT WHEN YOU POOP!" & my dog stopped eating, so if you need a motivational speaker contact me
@bourgeoisalien: [robber breaks into my house] i always knew you'd come for me, my darling. where are you going