@HALFniteStand: "The past tense of LOL is not LOL'd, it's L'dOL." - How I like to end a date with 18-25 year old girls.
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@Samigrl2: "Do what you love & the money will follow." Ate some pizza, harassed a telemarketer, & took a 6 hr nap in my underwear. And now, I wait...
@laurenreeves: "911, what's your emergency?" "Hi. Long time listener, first time caller." "That's really funny." "Thank you. Anyways, I'm being stabbed."