@KenJennings: The plural of "person on Segway" is "losers."
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@doublewenis: Hey...quick question, fellas: Does it still count as leg day if you just shaved them?
@ObscureGent: Is it weird to think about naming my next cat Batman during sex? Sir, I just serve coffee here. But no, it's not weird. It's fantastic!
@StansaidAirport: Festive Fact: Women who put on weight over the festive period are 98% more likely to live longer than their partners who point it out.