@pixelatedboat: The problem with millennials is they were taught to look up to Pokemon not *struggles to think of a thing old people respect* Mussolini
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@Brentweets: "Hi doc!" "Hi! What is that behind your ear?" "Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"
@IRLPepperMD: "You think I'm immature? Well, you know what! Our relationship is-" *holds up imaginary walky-talky* "Chhh-over."
@briangaar: "Congratulations, the baby's got green overalls!" Peach sobs. Mario flies into a rage.
@tigersgoroooar: just saw a church sign that says, “santa claus never died for anyone.” and i’m like, “okay well jesus never brought me a barbie dreamhouse.”