@TheCatWhisprer: The problem with teaching a man to fish is that eventually somebody will microwave that fish in the work break room.
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@turtledumplin: When a cop pulls you over, pull out a map and ask them for directions until they forget that they pulled you over. -me, right now
@WongLipJun: Rules for rap battling Eminem: 1. Do not let Eminem go first. 2. Do not let Eminem go second.
@ExcuseMyTweets: It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm quite busy.
@dumbbeezie: I hate it when you have french fries and all of the sudden people are acting like they like you