@shanethevein: The problem with the world today is that intelligent people are too smart to have children.
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@TheMichaelRock: Hell hath no fury like a white woman emailing Target after a bad shopping experience.
@rad_milk: the flight attendant came down the aisle holding out a bag of trash to me and i was like "sure what the hell" and grabbed a couple pieces
@joeljeffrey: They say it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something. Please. You wanna know expertise? I've spent over 300,000 hrs being a moron