@SwirlySkittles: The rain is pounding so hard I'm kind of jealous.
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@abbycohenwl: Doc: The good news is this is a surprise birthday party! Patient: But my birthday's not till next month Doc:Which brings me to the bad news
@MatCro: [first day as a midwife] ME: Keep pushing! I can see the head! NURSE: You're at the wrong end.
@KeetPotato: cop: [making list of animals that escaped] zookeeper: "the tigers should be your top priority" cop: [scribbling out ducks] "obviously"
@whereami18: Saying no thanks to a CW's offer to hit me with their car so I could take the day off proves decisions shouldn't be made before coffee