@NicCageMatch: The rats outside my apartment building are getting very bold. One of them just asked me for my number.
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@Sarcasticsapien: Coworker: Guess what day it is? Me: Don't. CW: Guess what day it is? Me: Don't. CW: It's hum.. [30 min later] Cop: So you stapled his lips?
@MarcusTheToken: Ok I just started watching House M.D.:nn1 Does everyone gang up and beat House's other leg?n2 does a rival Token come in to challenge Omar?
@donni: Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, though, it's every man for himself