@kyry5: The reason I switched from a backpack to a messenger bag is so that I look more classy and professional carrying nothing but snacks to work.
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@ElKnuckelhombre: Damn, i got hit with the "we need to talk" from my wife. Thank God it was just about divorce. I was scared shitless it was an intervention.
@MomOnFire: My son just said, “Peace on Earth, goodwill to men,” and shot me in the face with a Nerf™️ gun.