@PimpBillClinton: The replacement refs pulled a @KimKardashian last night (screwed 53 rich black guys at the same time).
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@sarcasm_inc: *leans into microphone* My question is for Salt-N-Pepa. "Hi" "Hey" Hi."Push It" is about takin a dump, right? "No" "Nope" *hands friend $5*
@abbycohenwl: I need an aggressive dog-barking sound on my phone, for whenever anyone knocks on the bathroom door when I'm in there
@daveexplosm: If God hates gays so much, why didn't he put it in the ten commandments? Instead he's more pissed that you're jealous of your friend's PS4