@AGreaterMonster: The Rock is going to have a kid, which they'll name Pebbles.
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@ImFunnyMang: And on the 32nd day, God had forgotten to end his free trial, so he was charged for the month.
@Jade_VK: [alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days
@Elizasoul80: I'm gonna hire a person to speak at my funeral and say a bunch of crazy stuff about me so my friends and family think I had a secret life.