@Pundamentalism: The saddest thing about trying to find a needle in a haystack is that your horse is hiding a drug habit from you.
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@jazmasta: They laughed at me when I bought Velcro sneakers but no one will be laughing when the great shoelace drought of 2044 comes
@kyry5: I never got why people liked sitting home without pants so much until I was without a job for a week. Now I don't get why people have jobs.
@TinaraMinus10: DON'T YOU LIKE ME! I WANNA MARRY YOU! WHY AM I IN THE TRUNK! -and other things I hear from guys on first dates
@justmeundead: Me: *trying to sleep Brain: He said you were pretty Me: *smiles Brain: but not beautiful