@Mindless4Miles: The secret to my success lies with you having a poor grasp on it's definition.
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@kelkulus: My go-to office prank is to sneak onto someone's unattended Facebook page and post "I'm undecided, which should I get, iPhone or Android?"
@hazelmotes1: You literally misuse the word "literally" every time you say it. And I figuratively want to punch you in the face. Literally.
@PattiOShankable: My kids saw a painting of Jesus & both thought it was Bob Marley. Clearly, I'm going to hell. My kids don't know what Bob Marley looks like