@jdbalani: The self checkout lane was probably invented by a guy who was sent to the store to buy tampons.
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@Zambah_: Time zones are amazing! Here in New Zealand it's tomorrow, in America it's yesterday and in North Korea it's 1980.
@Jacob_Swift16: Me: do you want to hear what happened to the last guy who threatened me? Bumper cars operator: i meant your time is up, like for the ride
@thatUPSdude: Turns out cops get really pissed if you slip out of your handcuffs even if you say "Ta-Da" when you do.
@stevevsninjas: This hasn't helped my bull get any sleep at all. In fact, the closer I get to him with the bulldozer, the more agitated he gets.