@Hobo_Splendido: The "self-lubricated catheter" and the "discreet pocket catheter" have me rethinking what role catheters ought to be playing in my life.
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@BitterOldPunk: "Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus" is on, followed by "Mega Shark vs Crocasaurus". Nice job, SyFy. Way to GIVE AWAY THAT GIANT OCTOPUS LOSES.
@StellaRtwot: I like to yawn in front of people so they yawn and then I can say "You're tired I should go."
@WeissBrandon: Cop: know y I pulled u over? Wife: to invite me to the state trooper's ball? Cop: state troopers don't have balls Me: BAHAHA Cop: drive safe
@Moldy_Jellybean: My signature move is getting drunk before anyone can ask me to be the designated driver.