@3sunzzz: The Shining is my favorite movie about what can happen when you spend too much time with family.
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@hunz74: My 10 year old: "If nothing is faster than the speed of light, how did the darkness get there first." Me: "What?"
@IamEveryDayPpl: My neighbors started Christmas decorating right after they ran out of Halloween candy so I called the police.
@seamussaid: FIRST GUY TO RECEIVE A LETTER IN AN ENVELOPE: oh I get it she wrapped up a piece of paper in.... another piece of paper
@writerPT: Coworker: You look tired. Did you not get enough sleep last night? Me: Nope. Slept great! But thanks for telling me I look like shit.