@DemetriMartin: The technical term for the very bottom of a banana is the "bananus".
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@redthe1: Yeah, sure, I use made-up words sometimes. Does that make you [Lowers shades] Discomfortable?
@fillthevacuum: Pro tip: The Labor Day weekend is a great time to start drafting your Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas tweets.
@Tommytoughstuff: "Hello welcome to meteorologist school. Please stick your head out of the nearest window and pick your diploma up on your way out."
@Beatonm5: Next time someone asks you how you slept, close your eyes & say “like this” & just stay that way for like 8 hours!!!