@PyrBliss: The trick to falling asleep is putting your phone down. Unfortunately, that's not a risk I'm willing to take.
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@noneofyours99: I showed my family facebook a few years ago, and haven't heard from them since. Best decision ever
@RadOrDie: Give the chick a break. Kristen Stewart TOTALLY looks sorry. Or happy. Or sad. Or constipated.
@EtobicokeErnie: The lottery gives you a 1 in 200 million chance of not going to work tomorrow. Tequila gives you a 1 in 3 chance.