@JoParkerBear: The true mark of maturity is when somebody hurts you, and you try to understand them in order to best tailor a revenge plot that suits them.
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@Writepop: Just found out that the old guy at the gym who laughs at all my jokes doesn't actually speak English.
@sarcasticmommy4: My teens cleaned their rooms & according to my sink & countertops, they've been hoarding my whole kitchen.
@VerifiedJayy: When a guy tries to talk to me while at a urinal I instantly slide over and start pissing in his urinal too. See how friendly he really is