@SanuTweetsU: The universe contains protons,neutrons,electrons and morons.
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@simoncholland: You wouldn't believe all of the Easter eggs I just found lying in the grass outside of this preschool.
@sweetandweak: Daughter just told me, "Dad, I don't make sandwiches, I eat sandwiches." One day her picture will be on money.
@gitson_shiggles: Turns out that when asked which was my favourite of all the X-Men that "Caitlyn Jenner" was not a valid answer.