@Phook75: The upside to having kids is how you're able to use them as an excuse to cancel unwanted plans
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@GloriaFallon123: My 7-year-old daughter asked me twice today "what poison would kill someone the fastest?" and now I'm wondering if I've underestimated her.
@knot_eye: Even though she's not Native American, my Wife always sends smoke signals to let me know when dinner is ready.
@KarenLyneButler: I want Rebecca Black to make a music video for every day of the week! Said by nobody. Ever.