@TheToddWilliams: The vast majority of spider couples met on the web.
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@BuckyIsotope: Barbie's head is in the refrigerator. Ken swears a "giant child" did it. The police shrug and slap handcuffs on Ken and lead him away.
@craydrienne: Twitter: your jokes suck Instagram: your face sucks Snapchat: your life sucks Facebook: your family misses you and is also racist
@robdelaney: My mom always used to give me a card on Valentine’s Day when I was a kid. She stopped doing it when we broke up.
@fightforfood: You can pretty much tell me anything is an anagram and I'll believe it. I'm not about to rearrange a bunch of letters like some doctor