@JennyJohnsonHi5: The "walk of shame" should be going to a bar the next morning after being drunk looking for your lost debit card.
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@BuiltToTopple: You two, right there. You don't know it yet, but you'll be coming home with me. *points at hotel towels*
@OtherDanOBrien: *Lady gives balloon to my son* ME: What do u say? SON: I WILL CRUSH MY ENEMIES ME: *nervous laughter* No, the other thing SON: Oh. Thank you
@blacksab67: Sarah Palin being on a climate change panel with Bill Nye is like Sarah Palin being on a climate change panel with Bill Nye.