@thegayfarmerguy: The wind blew a smart car into my lane and I had to roll down my window and swat it out of the way.
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@SteveKoehler22: Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense ? So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.
@GregHenchman: I wonder if Scarlett Johansson ever fantasizes about fat comic book nerds, or is that just a one-way street?
@Brianhopecomedy: I wish the guy who made the vacuum cord would chat with the guys that make phone chargers.
@amazymay72x: Me: Cleaning the basement. 12yo boy: Let me know if u need help. 13yo girl: Let me know when you're done. Yep...throwing out HER crap.