@markleggett: The worst part of being an astronaut would be eventually having to come back to Earth and deal with other people.
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@djdarrellripley: Him: I'll pay for dinner. Me: I want to pay. Him: I'll feel better if you let me pay. Me: Well, if your health is involved, go ahead...
@thenatewolf: Telescopes probably use mirrors which means there is absolutely no way to know how many vampires there are in space.
@gorrdano: I help morning mall walkers get their blood flowing by chasing them down with a chainsaw.
@JennyPentland: "Mommy, I don't wanna grow up and die!" "Oh. Well, you can die at any age, really."